Many people struggle with body image, both women and men. It is rare in our culture to find a person who is completely satisfied with how their body looks and feels.
Body image is the mental image you have of your body, along with your attitudes, feelings and beliefs about your body. If you have a more negative body image, you may say unkind things to yourself about how you look, focus on your (perceived) imperfections in the mirror, shy away from wearing particular clothes for fear of exposing your "flaws," or perhaps punish your "bad body" with a new diet or grueling exercise. Unfortunately, negative body image is far more common, and when considering that our culture is obsessed with thinness and "perfection," it makes sense.
Social media photos, photoshopped images and advertisements, the unrelenting portrayal of thin bodies on tv and in movies, and the opinions of friends or family members- all greatly influence your body image. It's no surprise that you miss the positive and empowering aspects of your body.
To begin to improve your body image and feel better about yourself, you can start with respect. Showing respect for your body means nourishing your hunger with foods you enjoy, engaging in joyful movement when you feel like it, prioritizing rest, and speaking to yourself with kindness. For many, the idea of loving your body can feel impossible, however you don't have to love your body to respect it. Here are 6 ways in which you can show your body some respect.
One: Resist Comparisons
Comparing your body to someone else’s body (usually photoshopped or otherwise altered) is a trap. You probably already know this, but here's a reminder: most of the images you see on screens aren't real. For those "ideal" bodies that are real, consider the quality of life of the model. Wonder how they feel living each day with the obsession, insecurity and persistent hunger and fatigue that comes with rigid dieting; imagine what her life is really like behind the scenes. It is estimated that 1% of women are genetically thin, so the vast majority of ultra-thin bodies you see on screens are unnatural, in that they must take drastic, prolonged measures to look this way.
Moreover, body diversity is part of life and it is a good thing. Your body is unique, and simply cannot look like anyone else's. Consider the fact that you are in charge of your social media feed. Perhaps it's time to unfollow people that provoke bad feelings about yourself and find some better role models.
Two: Appreciate What Your Body Does for You
Your body is an incredible organism that has evolved over millions of years. Imagine the myriad tasks it accomplishes without any conscious effort from you: your body keeps you warm and cools you down; it fends off illnesses, threats and injuries; it supports and carries you; it transforms foods into brain power and energy; it connects you to your loved ones through touch and sensation; and it guides you toward the things/people/foods that are good for you via your feelings, "gut" sensations, and intuition.
When you find yourself saying mean things about your body, add in some friendly comments about the miraculous and life-saving functions that your body does for you.
Three: Eat Foods That You Enjoy
Many people make the mistake of believing that by eating less (i.e., restriction), that they are helping their body image. However, allowing hunger to persist predicts fatigue, irritability, generally inferior functioning, and binge or overeating. It is improbable that your body image will improve within this context.
By eating when you are hungry, you are proclaiming to yourself and to the world that you matter, that your body matters, and that you are entitled to eat. This can be very powerful for you if you tend to fear hunger, or ignore it.
4. Wear Clothes That You Like & That Fit Your Body Comfortably
So often clients tell me that they have a hard time buying new clothes after gaining weight. Shopping can be a challenging if not painful experience, and I understand your avoidance. However, you deserve to have clothes that you like, that feel good on your body, and that you're not constantly adjusting and pulling. This is especially true of underwear: please buy comfortable underthings that feel good and don't constantly distract you and make you feel that your body is somehow "wrong."
Buying larger clothes doesn't mean that you are a "failure," that you're "giving up," or that you are a bad person. It means that your body is changing (and that is ok), and that you respect your body by granting comfort and kindness. Body image is just as much about how you feel as it is about how you see yourself.
Your body is a worthy of love, pleasure, and respect, right now, regardless of size or shape.
5. Have Fun Moving Your Body
Joyful movement can be one of life's greatest pleasures, and is a good way to connect with your body in a friendly, empowering way. In contrast with grueling exercise, to goal of moving your body is to enjoy yourself. Moving your body helps you to develop trust in yourself and appreciation for your many capabilities.
By listen to the messages of your body, you can learn to engage in the physical activities that work for you, and will therefore be beneficial for your mental health, physical health, and body image. For example, if you are prone to injuries when you exercise, your body may be telling you that something you are doing isn't working for you. Experiment with different activities like hiking, dancing, neighborhood walks, strength training, yoga, gentle stretching, Zumba class, and if you're tired, perhaps a nap is best. Exercise can be empowering, but is not necessary. If you hate it, you don’t have to do it.
6. Be Gentle with Yourself
Life is complex and requires enormous fortitude. By showing yourself respect and kindness, you are signaling to yourself and your friends, family and coworkers that despite your (perceived) imperfections- your body matters. By practicing self-compassion you are deliberately nurturing yourself, which can improve your body image, and reduces the risk of binge eating along with the associated shame spiral. For some, self-compassion looks like self-forgiveness and the recognition that "mistakes" and "failures" are a part of life and do not diminish your value as a human being. For others, self-compassion might look like saying to yourself, "my body does a good job of keeping me safe, supported, and alive" when bullying thoughts intrude.
When body shame persists, it may feel impossible to feel at home in your body. These thoughts and feelings can be very painful, and may impede your ability to enjoy your life to the fullest. Working with a specialized therapist and dietitian can help tremendously.
Learn more about Body Image therapy.
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Legal disclaimer: The ACED team is comprised of mental health professionals licensed to practice in the state of Texas. Reading our blog does not create a therapist-client relationship between us. Our blog is designed for informational purposes only, and is not intended as a substitute for professional care. The contents of this blog should not be used to diagnose or treat illness of any kind, and before you rely on any information presented here you should consult with a trusted healthcare professional. If you are currently experiencing a mental health emergency please call 911 or the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.